I have been a WTF programmer

I have been a WTF programmer. Yes, I confess it. Although I bow to the Beautiful Code gods, and I spend my free time reading Lambda the Ultimate, there’s still this black spot on my resume. I am one of they. Today as I read 2007 best coding practices on WTF, I discovered myself relating to the poor, anonymous hack who used Trim() twice on a string just to make sure.

It all began with some simple Excel macros for my father´s business. Those led, as they do oftentimes, to Visual Basic. And from there, almost inevitably, to WTF programming. Because Visual Basic drives you to just change the code so that it works, without ever stopping to think about why it’s behaving that way. What’s the difference between using an Object or a Variant? Why, oh why, are there two assignment forms and which one should I use? Who cares?

I certainly didn’t, as I just wanted to end the app so that the ever-changing customer requirements, worse still, family requirements, would be satisfied and I could get the hell out of there and go back to my sweet, sweet Lisp programming.

And that’s it. Just to save some time, I have consciously programmed something that, if ever shown to the public eye, would make me live with shame for the rest of my life.

Just remember, as you read the next piece of WTF code, that it could have been me. Or anyone else in a hurry, really.

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